just went blog surfing... then i happen to go to some fellow's blog whom I haven't visited for a long time...
apparently, the person's recently attached and when i read this person's posts... I was so shocked la... super emo sia... I'm overwhelmed i tell u... Cos the person looks like a joker or is full of crap when out in a group in the past... but now seems so sad sad and emo... (feels like the person's having problem with the relationship).
then it suddenly dawn on me: will i be as emo as this person when i am in a relationship? it feels super awful feeling the way that fellow felt... i mean it's so horrible... it scares me to think that i will be that in the future...
BUT then again... i know that i may not be that emo after all :) haha... surrending my relationships (ie bgr matters) to the Lord will definately not make me feel that emo? cos i know that when the time is ripe, THE ONE will appear before me and will be the one that the Lord has given me... just like how Adam met Eve and how Issac met Rebekah... in a way it is very romantic =) for those who dunno what i am talking about, read the book of Genesis!
[this reminds me of one song from the youth hymnal: the Bible is a romance, in the most holy sense... so true =)]
in conclusion: PRAY AND WAIT...
then there's another problem: it seems like i cant wait for the Lord to show me the right one... i feel so despo :( dunno if it's normal to feel that a not... maybe someone can tell me?? a lot of time i told myself to wait upon the Lord but the despo feeling will just keep coming up from time to time... sianz... why are temptations so hard to resist... sob sob...
then again, it seems to me that all the more i should trust in Him... In Him i can find strength and the will to go on living in this world which i dun feel like to... cos of the stressed and busy lifestyle i am having now... Although i tell ppl i am fine with my life, actual fact it's not... but then again how to tell ppl when u are not when things are rather complicated, with lousy grades, improper time management and troubling family matters to factor in? haha...
Conclusion #2: Trust in the Lord always :)
I just realised some thing just now during my group discussion for YYP... i had completely forgotten to pray for my studies... it came as a bolt when out group was praying... probably that explains why i didn't do well for CTs and class tests... LOL!
Sorry Lord for not surrending my studies to You... I will do so from now on....
ok, gotta go now... byezzz....
P.S. this is not an emo post... the fellow mentioned above had posts worst than mine :P
